Today I got into an argument with my Aunt because she was upset that her daughter was dating a girl so I said
"Do you really think you should fall in love with someone’s genitals over their soul? Because that’s shallow and sad"
And my 75 year old grandmother who was sitting in her rocking chair, and who hasn’t said a word for the past hour screamed “OH BURN” and hit my aunt with a fly swatter
How many ears does Captain Kirk have?
three: a left ear, a right ear, and a final front ear.
voting against gay marriage is like ordering a piece of cake at a restaurant and having a complete stranger be like “waiter, cancel that cake”
"waiter cancel that cake it’s ruining my cake and i don’t know how to explain it to my children"
"my dietbook said I can’t have cake so throw that guy’s cake away too."
Friendly reminder that yesterday when my mom took me to Walmart she left me alone in the toilet paper section and this guy started hitting on me and I said “Sorry, I’m a lesbian.” and he was like “Oh my god I’m so sorry I thought you were a boy.”
Soda just spewed out my nose
THAT WAS A PLOT TWISTawwwwwww
You know what’s creepy about Humpty Dumpty?
They never said he was an egg.
all the king’s horses and all the king’s men couldn’t put Humpty Dumpty back together again BECAUSE HIS BLOOD WAS GUSHING OUT OF HIS CRACKED SKULL
SOMEONE PLEASE CHANGE THE SUBJECT BEFORE THE SHERLOCK FANDOM STARTS ANGSTING.
LOOK JAWN I’M HUMPTY DUMPTY
I just… I can’t even…
I posted this like in a minute and I have likes woah
you woman are my hero.
This is it haha
Yes Ron cover your boobs because you’re a girl
He’s also wearing a shirt
Guys… he lived with the goddamn Twins for YEARS, that’s probably an instinctive ‘Please don’t throw an experimental potion or giant spider on me’ reaction…
…at least he’ll never have that problem again…
Look me in the eye and tell me that was really necessary
NOT EVEN IN THE HARRY POTTER FANDOM AND THAT WAS A DOUCHE MOVE
how are you not in the fandom
i thought everyone was in the fandom
are you kidding me
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME
congrats on your talent
you know when teachers ask “are you here”
and it’s just like
emotionally? not so much
mentally? not at all
Cutest one-eyed chess dog bird cats I ever seen.
do people not realize this is homestuck?
I think colakidney knew it was homestuck. Otherwise how would they know that they are chess related and part cat